Maybe if the low five was being offered to you, you’d accept it. But when you’re down 103-87 with almost a minute left and you’re missing free throws, why are you asking your teammates for low fives? Fuck you.
Missed the game? You probably did something more constructive, like basketweaving or mowing your lawn at night. Here’s the play by play.
Even though Wikipedia is filled with the biggest group of attention-starved losers on the planet (outside of possibly Facebook and Twitter), the Administrators earn a point for putting Scientology in its rightful place.
How about next we lock out edits to the Tom Cruise page to everyone except Nicole Kidman and any IP from Germany?
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2009/05/29/wikipedia_bans_scientology/
Ok, come on dude.
In sentencing, Magistrate Dick Wallace said the defendant had already spent time in prison for a similar offence but had obviously not learned that the behaviour was unacceptable.
“It’s the sort of thing that makes the public very worried … it’s offensive and it’s worrying,” he said.
“I hope you won’t do these sorts of disturbing things again.”
Uh, he will.
http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2009/05/14/2570281.htm
If I have to see one more Facebook Quiz about “What type of salad dressing would you be?” or “Which feminine hygeine product would you be?” I am going to order 100 pizzas for delivery to Mark Zuckerberg.
Specifically, this article on Slate. Sotomayor’s diabetes is a good reason not to overload with her nougat, not keep her off the bench.
Nougat
Behind the scenes of the World Beard and Mustache Championships
“I’m not trying to prove to anybody that I’m going to be here for 30 years.”
Don’t worry, darling. We have so little fear in that. We’re counting down that fifteen minutes of fame clock, so we can throw you back to the Long Island laundromat you’ll be working for the rest of your days, smoking an unfiltered Marlboro with your dark roots showing, adjust your flappy hooters in a latex tube-top, mumbling incoherently, “Do ya know who I used to be? Huh? Do ya?”
No, lady. And I don’t care. Give me the change for the dollar I gave you, or I’ll do my laundry somewhere else. And put on some goddamn pants.
Really, Microsoft? You think running a super-cool ad campaign is going to convince people that your rebranded, mediocre search engine is worth using? Good luck prying marketshare away from Google’s deathgrip.
The only Bing worth checking out is Carmella. Oh yeah.
I really don’t know what offends me more - the fact that Matthew McConaughey comes across as dumb as a box of rocks in just about everything he does in either his real life or in his acting career, or the fact he has an acting career to begin with. This is not an intelligent man. He was arrested for disturbing the peace late at night, naked, stoned out of his mind and playing the bongos. Let’s repeat that. HE WAS PLAYING THE BONGOS NAKED. WITH ANOTHER DUDE IN THE ROOM. You know, I like my buddies just fine, and I like getting stoned with them just fine. I have never smoked so much shit that I thought, “You know what would really improve this little get-together? I should get naked and play the bongos.” No, that does not happen. Tommy fucking Chong has never smoked so much that such an idea would be considered a wise move.
Cooper’s Hill Cheese Rolling Of all the things I would run downhill for, cheese is low on the list.
